Comments:

katelyn - 2006-05-11 03:15:38
i just randomly read your entry, but i feel so sorry for you to have to put up with him. i hope your surgery goes well and so does your business. :)
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Killercat - 2006-05-11 06:06:16
I live with my ex because of my health and have to go through this same crap minus the heart ache. If you're able to work full time again I hope that you can leave. I'll live vicariously. *Hugs* for now.
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LA - 2006-05-11 07:58:43
Dearheart, that's no way to live. For either of you. Is there any way for you two to see a counselor? Sounds weird since we're divorcing, but marriage counseling was the best thing for us. Like you I was scared to say what I thought, scared of being in the street, scared of being alone and too ill to make a living. But in the counselor's office I was able to speak up. A 'referee' kept Mike in line enough that he couldn't shut me down with some nasty remark, nor could he just turn his back. After months of talking about things we could have NEVER spoken of at home we acknowledged we'd stuck together for all the wrong reasons and resented the crap out of one another. Right now you feel unloved and your husband's slimy power tripping and financial threats only make it harder for you to speak up. Trapped. It hurts. It's scary. It's also unnecessary. If he won't go see someone with you, you should go anyhow. You'll learn lots about yourself and how to communicate more effectively. Good luck, sweetie. ~LA
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serena (Of serenaville) - 2006-05-11 10:21:21
I popped over to leave belated thanks for your recent comment in my space, as your ident was new to me, and happened to read this entry on arrival. Gracious. Not feeling any right to comment myself, being as new here, I will simply admire LA's counsel... There's a reason she's called "the Sage". I fervently hope this situation works out for the best for you, Zen. Sending all strength and positive thoughts your way, meanwhile. I'll be sure to return, and read more in depth. *HUGS!!!*
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Holly - 2006-05-11 20:47:07
I think LA might be right. Even if he won't go, just talking to someone neutral might help you to get a handle on things and figure out what you want to do. He sounds like he's a bit spoiled and doesn't have a clue what things are like on the otherside. My own ex, was a lot like that, but he also had other serious issues. Nobody can tell you what to do, as we havne't walked in your sandals, but I do think you deserve to be treated better than that.
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cat - 2006-05-14 16:31:18
Having never been married, I will offer no counsel; just support because I know how difficult it is living in a body that betrays you at every turn. It's maddening and frustrating as hell because most people with chronic illnesses, if given the chance for recovery and ability to function like a "normal," healthy person, would jump at the opportunity. My parents *refuse* to see me as a burden, yet I still feel like an albatross; I can't begin to imagine the toll J's attitude is taking on your mental and physical health. Just want to add to the voices of support for you. And I agree with Serena: LA - whether she realizes it or not - carries the wisdome of a TRUE sage; if nothing else, her suggestions are definitely worth considering. *Hugs* Love, cat
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